Can't help but to post this one.....lots of Laughs

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blizzard
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Can't help but to post this one.....lots of Laughs

#1 Postby blizzard » Sun Nov 30, 2003 6:22 pm

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to
be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while
in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and
a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he
believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is
being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Ashcroft said. "They desire average
solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a
search of absolute value. They use secret code names like "x" and "y"
and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they
belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates
in every country.

"As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to
every triangle," Ashcroft declared.

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had
wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
given us more fingers and toes.

"I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is
intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to
disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to
inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said,
adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root,
make our point, and draw the line."
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hunter84
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#2 Postby hunter84 » Sun Nov 30, 2003 6:27 pm

I knew al-gebra was bad from the first time i was introduced to it.
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#3 Postby coriolis » Sun Nov 30, 2003 6:34 pm

The pain is rising exponentially.
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breeze
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#4 Postby breeze » Sun Nov 30, 2003 6:48 pm

LOL! I'm glad to see that the FBI is finally
taking math-ers into their own hands! :lol:
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#5 Postby coriolis » Sun Nov 30, 2003 7:19 pm

Good one, Breeze!
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wx247
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#6 Postby wx247 » Sun Nov 30, 2003 7:30 pm

:lol: :lol: I like that! :lol: :lol:
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#7 Postby David » Sun Nov 30, 2003 10:43 pm

Nice one Breeze!!! :)
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#8 Postby ColdFront77 » Mon Dec 01, 2003 12:33 am

How about the other "branches of mathematics"? :P
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#9 Postby JCT777 » Mon Dec 01, 2003 1:40 pm

LOL! Absolutely hysterical! :lol:
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#10 Postby TexasStooge » Mon Dec 01, 2003 1:46 pm

LOL!!! Read it before, but still hysterical! :lol:
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