He'll be with us for awhile.
"Sitting on the Front Porch"
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streetsoldier
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After high school, Coppertop intends to work, while on the way to earning his 1st Dan Black Belt; then (possibly) entering U.S. service in "Chaplain's Support Services", as he intends to become a pastor AND run/administer his own dojong according to Christian principles.
He'll be with us for awhile.
He'll be with us for awhile.
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azskyman
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Bill...I tried everything I could to become a chaplain's assistant back in 1970 after being drafted. I spent time with the chaplain at Fort Leonard Wood to see what my chances were...and work toward that end.
I became a 31Mike...a radio relay attendant...a forward communications specialist who would call in close air support.
I worked that MOS for less than 7 days and was transferred to HHC (Battalion HQ). Back then, they didn't see many teachers with college degrees being drafted, and I guess they thought I would better serve the Army if they let my brains get used instead of blown away.
I'm still here because of it.
I became a 31Mike...a radio relay attendant...a forward communications specialist who would call in close air support.
I worked that MOS for less than 7 days and was transferred to HHC (Battalion HQ). Back then, they didn't see many teachers with college degrees being drafted, and I guess they thought I would better serve the Army if they let my brains get used instead of blown away.
I'm still here because of it.
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streetsoldier
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Miss Mary
Miss Mary survived the dorm drop off! We drove our oldest daughter to college yesterday. It's a bittersweet thing is all I can say. You're so excited your son or daughter will be on their own, for them, but you're a little sad another chapter is ending. I had mixed emotions yesterday. Didn't break down crying (Shannon/pojo, you'd be proud of me!), teared up a few times. But did not really cry yet. What I'll miss is not knowing her daily whereabouts, hearing her voice, but already she's emailed us short notes. That will help. At her school, Western Kentucky University, they highly suggest incoming Freshmen come a week early, to better acclimate to their surroundings, get their books early, etc. We took advantage of this offer, 90% of Freshmen start this early. All in all, we thought that was a great way to start college. Classes start the 29th. A full week from now.
Just checking in with you all. This is going to be a big adjustment on our family, but I just keep looking at it from Nina's point of view - she doesn't need a clingy mother, she needs a mother who can back off and be there if needed. I have had a very rocky relationship with my own mother, since I was 16. I just do not want to repeat any of the smothering habits my mother did with me (and my brothers). After 30+ years, my mom still has no clue how to let go. You'd think I was 20 and still living at home, the way she carries on and all. Nina just smiles, knowing I will never be like that. This is her time to soar and soar she will. But is it easy letting go - no! Even if I have a hard time letting her go completely, I'm going to fake it, for her sake!
Mary
Just checking in with you all. This is going to be a big adjustment on our family, but I just keep looking at it from Nina's point of view - she doesn't need a clingy mother, she needs a mother who can back off and be there if needed. I have had a very rocky relationship with my own mother, since I was 16. I just do not want to repeat any of the smothering habits my mother did with me (and my brothers). After 30+ years, my mom still has no clue how to let go. You'd think I was 20 and still living at home, the way she carries on and all. Nina just smiles, knowing I will never be like that. This is her time to soar and soar she will. But is it easy letting go - no! Even if I have a hard time letting her go completely, I'm going to fake it, for her sake!
Mary
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Miss Mary
Shannon - well, she can't just show up, she doesn't have a car yet...he he And she's 3.5 hours away.....but she may come home in October and jokes she might want to work a shift or two Labor Day weekend, at her old job. So don't turn my work shirts in yet Mom.....LOL
I did break down crying yesterday. Knew something would set me off and grocery shopping did it. Laura was flinging all sorts of peanut butter items in the cart (jar, cereal, crackers, etc.) and saying - finally, I get to eat PB! I realized this was my first grocery shop in 17 years that I didn't have to read ingredient labels closely. We found out Nina had a peanut allergy when she was 1 year old. And we've never been able to keep it in the house or eat it ourselves. It was if she just wasn't living here anymore.....but of course she is, just not for a few months. I told Laura to put all the PB items in one place, on top of the fridge. And be careful when eating them (no goo on remotes, etc.). Just habits the Pediatricians ingrained in me! Checking food labels is second nature to me. So that is what did it!
I am not worried about her allergy though. She took 3 Epi-pens and Bendryl with her. There's a very good health center in the middle of campus. And she's been very responsible with this allergy for 10 years now. So it's not like I'm worried or anything, it just hit me smack dab in the middle of the grocery store, oh yeah this is how I USED to grocery shop....which of course started the tears....somehow I held them in until I got to the car. Boy, they flowed then!
Mary
I did break down crying yesterday. Knew something would set me off and grocery shopping did it. Laura was flinging all sorts of peanut butter items in the cart (jar, cereal, crackers, etc.) and saying - finally, I get to eat PB! I realized this was my first grocery shop in 17 years that I didn't have to read ingredient labels closely. We found out Nina had a peanut allergy when she was 1 year old. And we've never been able to keep it in the house or eat it ourselves. It was if she just wasn't living here anymore.....but of course she is, just not for a few months. I told Laura to put all the PB items in one place, on top of the fridge. And be careful when eating them (no goo on remotes, etc.). Just habits the Pediatricians ingrained in me! Checking food labels is second nature to me. So that is what did it!
I am not worried about her allergy though. She took 3 Epi-pens and Bendryl with her. There's a very good health center in the middle of campus. And she's been very responsible with this allergy for 10 years now. So it's not like I'm worried or anything, it just hit me smack dab in the middle of the grocery store, oh yeah this is how I USED to grocery shop....which of course started the tears....somehow I held them in until I got to the car. Boy, they flowed then!
Mary
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Miss Mary wrote:Shannon - well, she can't just show up, she doesn't have a car yet...he he And she's 3.5 hours away.....but she may come home in October and jokes she might want to work a shift or two Labor Day weekend, at her old job. So don't turn my work shirts in yet Mom.....LOL
I did break down crying yesterday. Knew something would set me off and grocery shopping did it. Laura was flinging all sorts of peanut butter items in the cart (jar, cereal, crackers, etc.) and saying - finally, I get to eat PB! I realized this was my first grocery shop in 17 years that I didn't have to read ingredient labels closely. We found out Nina had a peanut allergy when she was 1 year old. And we've never been able to keep it in the house or eat it ourselves. It was if she just wasn't living here anymore.....but of course she is, just not for a few months. I told Laura to put all the PB items in one place, on top of the fridge. And be careful when eating them (no goo on remotes, etc.). Just habits the Pediatricians ingrained in me! Checking food labels is second nature to me. So that is what did it!
I am not worried about her allergy though. She took 3 Epi-pens and Bendryl with her. There's a very good health center in the middle of campus. And she's been very responsible with this allergy for 10 years now. So it's not like I'm worried or anything, it just hit me smack dab in the middle of the grocery store, oh yeah this is how I USED to grocery shop....which of course started the tears....somehow I held them in until I got to the car. Boy, they flowed then!
Mary
if she has had wonderful control over her Peanut Allergy, she should be fine.
My freshman year I was on campus early for the freshman thing. I really didn't care for it... I had a nice idea of the campus and how things worked prior to entering the campus for my freshman year. 4 short years later, I now have my B.S. Crazy... time flew by!
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Miss Mary
She does have very good control over this allergy. Never eating something unless she's sure it's safe. Never stepping one foot into a Chinese Restaurant or one with peanuts offered in the bar (on the floor). She just walks right out of a place like that. Whew......not worried. She will do fine. I told my mom what got me crying and what does she do - pull a Marie Barone moment (she's so good at that)....oh no, however will she handle her allergy.....I said the same way she has for 10+ years now.....geez, my mom always knows just what NOT to say and says it!!!! LOL
Mary
Mary
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Good Job Mom!!!!!!! I was surprised when I read your first post about the day you dropped her off, then I kept reading. I knew it would happen sooner or later. The way you feel about your girls is so similar to my feelings about mine. You have such a great attitude - you'll do fine.
The last time that both of my girls and I were together, my oldest, Tracy looked at her younger sister, Tish, and said, "When did you get to be so "spoiled?" Tish just laughed and said, "The day after you left for college and I had Mom all to myself." lol
Big ((((((HUGS)))))) for you my friend.
I brew a pot of Earl Grey for ya.
Karan
The last time that both of my girls and I were together, my oldest, Tracy looked at her younger sister, Tish, and said, "When did you get to be so "spoiled?" Tish just laughed and said, "The day after you left for college and I had Mom all to myself." lol
Big ((((((HUGS)))))) for you my friend.
I brew a pot of Earl Grey for ya.
Karan
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Miss Mary
Yep, Laura is eating it up, all this extra attention. LOL You called that one right Karan.....
I could use that tea.
I have a heavy heart these days, haven't broken down crying today but I am sad a little. Feel like there's something missing. Keep thinking she'll come breezing thru the door, to change clothes after work and out the door again she'll go. What she did all summer long. I've even left her music in my car. I like her taste in music anyway....LOL My kids keep me current, on the latest band or music. Which is a good thing......
It's just hard to turn off that mom-thing. I just have to keep my dearly departed MIL in mind, she had it down to an art. Loving, supportive, never judgemental or critical, and always there if you needed her. Her phone calls barely lasted 5 minutes, you could not keep her on the phone.....oh I know you're busy, I'll let you go. I ended so many phone calls with her, saying, but wait I wanted to ask you and she'd be gone. My husband said she was always like that once they all grew up. A loving presence, in the background. I began taking notes as soon as I became her daughter-in-law.
mary
I could use that tea.
I have a heavy heart these days, haven't broken down crying today but I am sad a little. Feel like there's something missing. Keep thinking she'll come breezing thru the door, to change clothes after work and out the door again she'll go. What she did all summer long. I've even left her music in my car. I like her taste in music anyway....LOL My kids keep me current, on the latest band or music. Which is a good thing......
It's just hard to turn off that mom-thing. I just have to keep my dearly departed MIL in mind, she had it down to an art. Loving, supportive, never judgemental or critical, and always there if you needed her. Her phone calls barely lasted 5 minutes, you could not keep her on the phone.....oh I know you're busy, I'll let you go. I ended so many phone calls with her, saying, but wait I wanted to ask you and she'd be gone. My husband said she was always like that once they all grew up. A loving presence, in the background. I began taking notes as soon as I became her daughter-in-law.
mary
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Hang in there Mary, you're doing great! Each day will get a little easier. Easy for me to say, right? Mine are only 15 and 13. However, I got a little taste of it in early June when we had to send our exchange student back home to Germany. After being his mom for 5 months, I had a really hard time letting go. All those reminders: the grocery store trips - not buying his favorite food, walking past that empty room, and the first time in a restaurant asking for a table for 4 instead of 5.
That's good that she's not too far away ... you know, far enough to be independent from Mom and Dad, but close enough for visits. Thank God for email. We can communicate so easily with our loved ones who are far away.
I think it's time for a good cry, don't you? I get the feeling you're holding back. It's going to come sooner or later, so just grab a pint of Ben & Jerry's, hang out here on the porch with your friends, and bawl your eyes out. You'll feel better, for a while anyway.
That's good that she's not too far away ... you know, far enough to be independent from Mom and Dad, but close enough for visits. Thank God for email. We can communicate so easily with our loved ones who are far away.
I think it's time for a good cry, don't you? I get the feeling you're holding back. It's going to come sooner or later, so just grab a pint of Ben & Jerry's, hang out here on the porch with your friends, and bawl your eyes out. You'll feel better, for a while anyway.
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Miss Mary
Hey all - doing okay just very, very sad. But then as I begin to feel sad we're a family of 3 now, for the next few months, I'm happy for Nina. My emotions are all over the place these days! The little things are what set me off, Laura and I ran an errand last night. We decided to bring back ice cream. Knowing what her dad would want (milkshake), I asked - wonder what Nina would like, b/c I always ask that. We both got very sad. We were watching TV last night (Tommie Lee goes to college, what a riot that show is!) and I'd see headlights in the front windows. Out of habit I'd think oh Nina is home from work now.
That is what will be hard - the small adjustments. Smaller dinners to make. Laura plopping down to the table, declaring - oh great, another boring dinner! Meanwhile, I'm thinking, you want better meals, here are the pots and pans girl.....LOL But she's not my take charge daughter, still loves it when I make her pancakes.....so there ya have it.
I'm not the first parent to adjust to a college bound son or daughter, away from home. I will adjust. Thanks for helping me along the way!
I just truly feel like this was my saddest summer ever. July 4th my disabled BIL (see several posts above to understand) announced his wife wanted a divorce. Just as their 5 year old daughter was about to start school. We've all been very close to this child and now we rarely see her. Our hearts have been just broken over this breakup. Then Nina was flitting off here and there (Europe, Chicago) this summer. She had fun - tons! Which is the important thing. This was probably her best summer yet. It just felt like a summer with endings - closing another chapter with Nina and beginning a whole new one. Or entirely new book, if you want to look at it like that. And my BIL's marriage is ending (which has taken a very nasty turn, his wife has become a total stranger to the entire family now). I swear, it feels like yesterday when he sat down on my couch, for what was to be an enjoyable July 4th Cookout, and announced, I'm getting divorced (his wife told him he's too much work to care for now, she didn't want to do it anymore). How she can look herself in the mirror is beyond me......but then she and I had very different personalities/priorities. Since I try so hard not to judge others, 99.9% of the time, I've sincerely tried to see this breakup from her perspective. Let's just say it's not been easy!
Boy, I think I need one good cry today! I'd love to go see Revenge of the Sith, for the third time. I sob during that movie...yes sirree folks, bet ya didn't know I turned into a Star Wars geek this summer too, catching up on the Prequel Trilogy....and watching the Original Trilogy all over again.....he he.
Thanks for listening!
Mary
That is what will be hard - the small adjustments. Smaller dinners to make. Laura plopping down to the table, declaring - oh great, another boring dinner! Meanwhile, I'm thinking, you want better meals, here are the pots and pans girl.....LOL But she's not my take charge daughter, still loves it when I make her pancakes.....so there ya have it.
I'm not the first parent to adjust to a college bound son or daughter, away from home. I will adjust. Thanks for helping me along the way!
I just truly feel like this was my saddest summer ever. July 4th my disabled BIL (see several posts above to understand) announced his wife wanted a divorce. Just as their 5 year old daughter was about to start school. We've all been very close to this child and now we rarely see her. Our hearts have been just broken over this breakup. Then Nina was flitting off here and there (Europe, Chicago) this summer. She had fun - tons! Which is the important thing. This was probably her best summer yet. It just felt like a summer with endings - closing another chapter with Nina and beginning a whole new one. Or entirely new book, if you want to look at it like that. And my BIL's marriage is ending (which has taken a very nasty turn, his wife has become a total stranger to the entire family now). I swear, it feels like yesterday when he sat down on my couch, for what was to be an enjoyable July 4th Cookout, and announced, I'm getting divorced (his wife told him he's too much work to care for now, she didn't want to do it anymore). How she can look herself in the mirror is beyond me......but then she and I had very different personalities/priorities. Since I try so hard not to judge others, 99.9% of the time, I've sincerely tried to see this breakup from her perspective. Let's just say it's not been easy!
Boy, I think I need one good cry today! I'd love to go see Revenge of the Sith, for the third time. I sob during that movie...yes sirree folks, bet ya didn't know I turned into a Star Wars geek this summer too, catching up on the Prequel Trilogy....and watching the Original Trilogy all over again.....he he.
Thanks for listening!
Mary
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azskyman
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Hey Mary....with the new fall TV lineup coming soon (as you posted), you'll be wrapped up in your usual favorites plus LOST and more.
Yes this was a difficult summer for you...and emotions can run all over the place when that happens. If you're crying at Sith, you'll be keeping Kleenex in business when the new fall season comes!
109 here today, so we're still inside a lot. Taking some time off next week for a needed break...and then return to life according to Poppysky after that.
I'll drop a note while we're away. Perhaps post a photo or two as well!!!
Now let's keep Katrina from getting any more fiesty!!! My cousin in Broward County is offline tonight, so I don't think that is good news for her!
Yes this was a difficult summer for you...and emotions can run all over the place when that happens. If you're crying at Sith, you'll be keeping Kleenex in business when the new fall season comes!
109 here today, so we're still inside a lot. Taking some time off next week for a needed break...and then return to life according to Poppysky after that.
I'll drop a note while we're away. Perhaps post a photo or two as well!!!
Now let's keep Katrina from getting any more fiesty!!! My cousin in Broward County is offline tonight, so I don't think that is good news for her!
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vbhoutex
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Gee where have I heard this scenario before? Remember I have two that are now earning their own livings, or at least close to it. Mary, I promise it does get better and it really does get easier, but those good cries do help. Just ask my wife, who was told more than once that "no you are not driving up there to "bail her out"(not jail, well only once), "help her", "bring her home where she should be", etc. It truly is a great experience to go through as it does take you to another level, but I will admit it isn't always easy!!!
Have another sip of Earl Grey and eat some of that ice cream for me!!!
We got a wierd one today. My son's fiancee's parents are apparently sepearating and divorcing just as we begin to plan for their wedding which is planned for Nov. 11, 2006.
Have another sip of Earl Grey and eat some of that ice cream for me!!!
We got a wierd one today. My son's fiancee's parents are apparently sepearating and divorcing just as we begin to plan for their wedding which is planned for Nov. 11, 2006.
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Miss Mary
Steve - somehow I don't think I'm going to be crying over Lost! I'll be on the edge of my seat though.....Laura's into reruns with me, big-time. She saw promo's for next season and almost came running to me - Mom, Lost is so scary next season, the little boy gets kidnapped! I just sighed and said I know. How do you know? I said well on a VCR tape somewhere I have the season finale. She wanted to jump instantly ahead about 7 or 8 episodes, as if to say - cough it up! LOL But I didn't let her watch it yet. Holding her back.....speaking of Lost, they will air 2 episodes each Wednesday starting Aug. 31st. 9 to 11 (EST), which will lead right into the season premiere. So if you're missing Lost, tune in!
Thanks for letting me vent and cry. David, thanks for the flip side - when they're thru college and on their own. I have two nieces on my side of the family, 25 and 28. We've been thru a lot with one, but the other is very grounded - engaged to be married in 2006. And she was the one that gave her family real fits in HS - flunked her Jr. year, got into drugs and alcohol, defiant mood, they put her in a Kids Helping Kids program for a year. We all thought she'd turn 18 and we've never see her again, b/c she'd be so resentful they did that. Well, she went the other way. Got a 2 yr degree and is now working full time, taking part time evening classes towards her Bach. degree. Wants to be a HS counselor! Because of all she went thru and the teens years she just tossed away. Hopefully if we give our kids a good foundation and they stray, they come back. This niece did. The other one is divorced already and went right from that relationship to another. This time, she's just living with the guy. We rarely hear from her, I think she's somewhat embarrassed about her choices in life. Hey I've made mistakes but you can't force a close relationship (aunt to niece) if it's not there. I always thought I'd be closest to this niece (our first grandchild in my family, how cherished she was!), but I never hear from her. The one with teen troubles but has her act together in her 20s, is the one I'm close with. Strange how things rarely turn out as you think they will. That's what makes life interesting!
David - that was sad about your son's fiance's parents splitting up. What timing! Do you think seeing your son and their daughter so happy, is what did it? Made them realize they are not happy together? That would be hard to hold together, for the sake of a upcoming wedding. I just hope things go smoothly and the focus will remain on the bride and groom.
My college Freshman is having a lot of fun on campus and making new friends. She wrote in a recent email she was going to play Rugby. This is our ballet, violin playing, artsy daughter. We all did a whoa! Rugby? We all were shaking our heads over that one. Turns out it's an all girls team and after they play, there's a party with the all boys Rugby team. Ah ha! Now we know why she chose Rugby! But again, we are still asking ourselves, Rugby? Laura keeps saying she has to tape her ears down mom! Laura's our accident prone daughter (many fractures, scrapes, stitches along the way). Nina had the life threatening allergy to peanuts and only had one true ER run, in 18 years. Laura meanwhile went thru a stage where after a while, I remained quiet in the Ped's office so she could explain about the latest accident. I told Jim once - they are going to question us at some point! Laura never walked anywhere - she ran, and ran fast. Jumped down 8 steps at a time, never walked. Our tomboy...I used to say, oh go find a good book, a comfortable chair and just read. NO, and off she'd go, jumping, climbing. So when I heard Nina was playing Rugby, I swear I pictured an ER run, on campus! Please pray I'm wrong on that one....
Mary
Thanks for letting me vent and cry. David, thanks for the flip side - when they're thru college and on their own. I have two nieces on my side of the family, 25 and 28. We've been thru a lot with one, but the other is very grounded - engaged to be married in 2006. And she was the one that gave her family real fits in HS - flunked her Jr. year, got into drugs and alcohol, defiant mood, they put her in a Kids Helping Kids program for a year. We all thought she'd turn 18 and we've never see her again, b/c she'd be so resentful they did that. Well, she went the other way. Got a 2 yr degree and is now working full time, taking part time evening classes towards her Bach. degree. Wants to be a HS counselor! Because of all she went thru and the teens years she just tossed away. Hopefully if we give our kids a good foundation and they stray, they come back. This niece did. The other one is divorced already and went right from that relationship to another. This time, she's just living with the guy. We rarely hear from her, I think she's somewhat embarrassed about her choices in life. Hey I've made mistakes but you can't force a close relationship (aunt to niece) if it's not there. I always thought I'd be closest to this niece (our first grandchild in my family, how cherished she was!), but I never hear from her. The one with teen troubles but has her act together in her 20s, is the one I'm close with. Strange how things rarely turn out as you think they will. That's what makes life interesting!
David - that was sad about your son's fiance's parents splitting up. What timing! Do you think seeing your son and their daughter so happy, is what did it? Made them realize they are not happy together? That would be hard to hold together, for the sake of a upcoming wedding. I just hope things go smoothly and the focus will remain on the bride and groom.
My college Freshman is having a lot of fun on campus and making new friends. She wrote in a recent email she was going to play Rugby. This is our ballet, violin playing, artsy daughter. We all did a whoa! Rugby? We all were shaking our heads over that one. Turns out it's an all girls team and after they play, there's a party with the all boys Rugby team. Ah ha! Now we know why she chose Rugby! But again, we are still asking ourselves, Rugby? Laura keeps saying she has to tape her ears down mom! Laura's our accident prone daughter (many fractures, scrapes, stitches along the way). Nina had the life threatening allergy to peanuts and only had one true ER run, in 18 years. Laura meanwhile went thru a stage where after a while, I remained quiet in the Ped's office so she could explain about the latest accident. I told Jim once - they are going to question us at some point! Laura never walked anywhere - she ran, and ran fast. Jumped down 8 steps at a time, never walked. Our tomboy...I used to say, oh go find a good book, a comfortable chair and just read. NO, and off she'd go, jumping, climbing. So when I heard Nina was playing Rugby, I swear I pictured an ER run, on campus! Please pray I'm wrong on that one....
Mary
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Miss Mary
Well, all that is going on in my family right now, certainly pales in comparison to our New Orleans, Biloxi, Gulfport, etc. residents. My heart is so heavy today. The news we are seeing is devastating to watch and yet watch, we do. The only good thing I can say is this is the US and we will take care of our own. Oh yes we will!
Mary
PS - I'm taking a break from the OT forum right now. I hate to admit this, but the usual topics we discuss just feel trivial. I hope that makes sense. I'm going to focus on the Tropics forum and concentrate on hearing from Linda soon, hopefully.........
Mary
PS - I'm taking a break from the OT forum right now. I hate to admit this, but the usual topics we discuss just feel trivial. I hope that makes sense. I'm going to focus on the Tropics forum and concentrate on hearing from Linda soon, hopefully.........
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therock1811
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I'm sending my thoughts across the river...I know adjusting to one of your own leaving can be hard. My sister left over a year ago. It's been hard on mom, but she doesn't cry as often. She came out strong, and I think you will too.
BTW, are you getting any impact from the Styrene leak? Meant to ask that yesterday when it was so bad.
BTW, are you getting any impact from the Styrene leak? Meant to ask that yesterday when it was so bad.
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Miss Mary
Jeremy - no, we're to the east of that area. Close but not close enough, thankfully. That could have been a very frightening situation. Getting to work via 275, to 471 was a long commute my hubby said. He was at a standstill just trying to merge onto the highway, here in Anderson Twp. Before he even crossed the river!
Mary
Mary
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