Grandparent's rights
Posted: Mon Nov 03, 2003 6:24 am
Seperation and divorce are not something you always plan for - most people want a good secure marriage. And if a marriage sours, often times the partners can't be civil to one another because issues that should have been addressed have been overlooked and the heat of the moment often directs our actions.
To this end, I'd like to share a true life story in the hopes that others can tuck this away for future reference in the event this ever happens to them.
My son and his wife were divorced after 4 years of marriage. Neither one of them were ready for marriage to begin with - he was more interested in acquiring "things" - she was much too young (16). But out of their short union, they had a beautiful son named Chance.
As part of the divorce, Chance's mom was granted custodial status and my son was given visitation rights. All parties live here in Florida but there is about a 100 mile difference from the places they live. At first, pickup and dropoff of Chance was done at the local police station since she didn't want us to know where she lived. When her car broke down, she agreed to give us directions to her house.
She was very liberal with visitation - in fact, rather than every other weekend, we got Chance every weekend. He spent all his school vacations with us, including the entire summer. There was never any argument about holiday visitation - we were fortunate that she agreed we could have him holidays. And when she got pregnant two more times from her new partner, she called us to take Chance since she didn't have family to leave him with while she delivered. Unfortunately, the 2nd child died and we were asked to keep Chance while funeral arrangements were made and she had time to resolve the feelings she was having after losing a child.
Unfortunately, almost two years ago my son got into some legal problems and was sentenced to 18 months in prison. The day after he was led away, I got a phone call (followed up a letter by an attorney) that stated that I was no longer allowed contact with Chance. For the last 18 months, I have been fighting to be able to see my grandson. But at every turn, the State of Florida has denied my petitions. The State claims that there is no such thing as "grandparent's rights" in the State of Florida. The Florida Supreme Court reached a decision years ago that a parent should be able to raise his/her children without what was termed "interference' from grandparents.
To make a long story short, in the event that a divorce should occur in your family and you are the grandparent, make sure you know your rights. It's been a long painful 18 months for me and I'm missing some of the best years of a child's life.
To this end, I'd like to share a true life story in the hopes that others can tuck this away for future reference in the event this ever happens to them.
My son and his wife were divorced after 4 years of marriage. Neither one of them were ready for marriage to begin with - he was more interested in acquiring "things" - she was much too young (16). But out of their short union, they had a beautiful son named Chance.
As part of the divorce, Chance's mom was granted custodial status and my son was given visitation rights. All parties live here in Florida but there is about a 100 mile difference from the places they live. At first, pickup and dropoff of Chance was done at the local police station since she didn't want us to know where she lived. When her car broke down, she agreed to give us directions to her house.
She was very liberal with visitation - in fact, rather than every other weekend, we got Chance every weekend. He spent all his school vacations with us, including the entire summer. There was never any argument about holiday visitation - we were fortunate that she agreed we could have him holidays. And when she got pregnant two more times from her new partner, she called us to take Chance since she didn't have family to leave him with while she delivered. Unfortunately, the 2nd child died and we were asked to keep Chance while funeral arrangements were made and she had time to resolve the feelings she was having after losing a child.
Unfortunately, almost two years ago my son got into some legal problems and was sentenced to 18 months in prison. The day after he was led away, I got a phone call (followed up a letter by an attorney) that stated that I was no longer allowed contact with Chance. For the last 18 months, I have been fighting to be able to see my grandson. But at every turn, the State of Florida has denied my petitions. The State claims that there is no such thing as "grandparent's rights" in the State of Florida. The Florida Supreme Court reached a decision years ago that a parent should be able to raise his/her children without what was termed "interference' from grandparents.
To make a long story short, in the event that a divorce should occur in your family and you are the grandparent, make sure you know your rights. It's been a long painful 18 months for me and I'm missing some of the best years of a child's life.