Man, I hate my job

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OpieStorm

Man, I hate my job

#1 Postby OpieStorm » Tue Aug 04, 2009 8:50 pm

My job is so unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be girl. Yeah, okay, she is attractive, but she is completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breath.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10 though. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big dog to work. Every day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single day. Anyway, I drive these weirdos around in my van and we solve mysteries and stuff.
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#2 Postby x-y-no » Tue Aug 04, 2009 9:43 pm

So that means this is you, yes?

Image
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Derek Ortt

Re: Man, I hate my job

#3 Postby Derek Ortt » Tue Aug 04, 2009 11:07 pm

OpieStorm wrote:My job is so unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be girl. Yeah, okay, she is attractive, but she is completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breath.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10 though. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big dog to work. Every day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single day. Anyway, I drive these weirdos around in my van and we solve mysteries and stuff.


some life advice for you boy,

1. Do not publicly say you hate your job. If I were your employer, I'd have you fired the second you come in the next day

2. Do not berate your colleagues on a public forum. Who are you? Lance Armstrong? Didn't work at le Tour de France and won't work here. It only creates needless tension and can also lead to your termination

3. I hope you shave everything since you hate hair that much. Never expect someone to do something that you yourself are not willing to do. Besides, what makes a person is not whether they are hot. It is how they are as a person that matters. If someone is a total sweetie and you reject her because she is not "hot enough" for you... well... you are probably letting someone truly special go bye bye

In short, think before you post and mature just a little
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Re: Man, I hate my job

#4 Postby CajunMama » Wed Aug 05, 2009 12:23 am

Derek Ortt wrote:
OpieStorm wrote:My job is so unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be girl. Yeah, okay, she is attractive, but she is completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breath.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10 though. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big dog to work. Every day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single day. Anyway, I drive these weirdos around in my van and we solve mysteries and stuff.


some life advice for you boy,

1. Do not publicly say you hate your job. If I were your employer, I'd have you fired the second you come in the next day

2. Do not berate your colleagues on a public forum. Who are you? Lance Armstrong? Didn't work at le Tour de France and won't work here. It only creates needless tension and can also lead to your termination

3. I hope you shave everything since you hate hair that much. Never expect someone to do something that you yourself are not willing to do. Besides, what makes a person is not whether they are hot. It is how they are as a person that matters. If someone is a total sweetie and you reject her because she is not "hot enough" for you... well... you are probably letting someone truly special go bye bye

In short, think before you post and mature just a little


A little brutal there eh derek? I believe he's joking and talking about the scooby doo cartoon/movie characters.
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OpieStorm

Re: Man, I hate my job

#5 Postby OpieStorm » Wed Aug 05, 2009 12:23 am

Derek Ortt wrote:
OpieStorm wrote:My job is so unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be girl. Yeah, okay, she is attractive, but she is completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breath.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10 though. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big dog to work. Every day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single day. Anyway, I drive these weirdos around in my van and we solve mysteries and stuff.


some life advice for you boy,

1. Do not publicly say you hate your job. If I were your employer, I'd have you fired the second you come in the next day

2. Do not berate your colleagues on a public forum. Who are you? Lance Armstrong? Didn't work at le Tour de France and won't work here. It only creates needless tension and can also lead to your termination

3. I hope you shave everything since you hate hair that much. Never expect someone to do something that you yourself are not willing to do. Besides, what makes a person is not whether they are hot. It is how they are as a person that matters. If someone is a total sweetie and you reject her because she is not "hot enough" for you... well... you are probably letting someone truly special go bye bye

In short, think before you post and mature just a little

It was a joke reference to Scooby Doo, nothing in that post is true or has anything to do with me or any actual persons. :wink:
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Derek Ortt

#6 Postby Derek Ortt » Wed Aug 05, 2009 8:21 am

oops :oops:

thats what happens when I try and read these posts so late at night
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#7 Postby Tampa Bay Hurricane » Wed Aug 05, 2009 2:12 pm

LOL x 1 BILLION!
I can has Scooby Doo? (what's with the lolcat anyway)
But yea this thread is pretty funny :lol:
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Re:

#8 Postby DanKellFla » Wed Aug 05, 2009 8:28 pm

Derek Ortt wrote:oops :oops:

thats what happens when I try and read these posts so late at night


Thanks for a golden LOL moment.
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Re: Man, I hate my job

#9 Postby Jinkers » Thu Aug 06, 2009 10:59 pm

:lol: :lol:
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#10 Postby brunota2003 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 9:30 am

Jinkys! I raut I raw a ronster!
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#11 Postby Frank2 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 12:23 pm

I was never a Scooby-Doo person (I'm a Garfield and Friends man - you know, the barn yard cartoon with Sheldon, Orson, etc.), so I fell also fell for your post of fiction...

Still, what Derek said is very true...

Actually, I heard something on the radio yesterday that was about being careful when critizing those we work with (a/k/a you never know who's listening):

"An executive trainee started working for a large corporation and decided to phone his secretary for coffee, demanding she bring him a cup of coffee - NOW!, but to his dismay, the man's voice on the other end angrily asked him, "Do you know who this is - this is the President of the company!". On hearing that, the trainee asked him, "Do you know who this is?" and the President said, "No" - with that, the trainee said, "Good!" - and hung up...
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Re:

#12 Postby lester » Fri Aug 07, 2009 3:11 pm

Frank2 wrote:I was never a Scooby-Doo person (I'm a Garfield and Friends man - you know, the barn yard cartoon with Sheldon, Orson, etc.), so I fell also fell for your post of fiction...


I LOVED that cartoon :cheesy:
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